volcanic's Diaryland Diary ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- spaniels & love puppies So... I am improved. Considerably improved, and that, I feel, can only be a good thing. Not quite sure what brought about such a dramatic change in the ol' volcanic zeitgeist, but it feel heck of a lot better to be feeling human and normal and real again. I'm getting better at riding out these little blips. And, indeed, at actually recognising them as "blips" rather than pathologising them, and convincing myself that I'm mentally ill, instead of realising that I'm a bit flat, still grieving a serious relationship, and probably having a mild drug comedown. Good god- I'm 32 in a couple of weeks' time. Maybe I'm getting a bit old for all this kind of malarkey. I went to my conference the other day. My, that was fun. Well, kind of fun. I commented to one of my colleagues that everyone looked a bit grown-up and sensible. I didn't. I was wearing my shocking pink, sequin encrusted cardigan and far too much mascara. Most of the other nurses there work in general hospital settings (ie sick people rather than mad ones) and I like to help them maintain their outdated and stereotyped view of mental health nurses as being a bit wayward and peculiar. In the car on the way back I found the New Woman Book of Bloke Jokes in the seat pocket, which had us all in stiches. Dreadful stuff, really, like: What do you call the useless flap of skin at the end of a penis? A Bloke But we laughed. Lots. If you feel the need to enrich your life with more Bloke Jokes, look here [Disclaimer: I like blokes, honestly. Blokes are great, and right now I could do with one. Offers to the usual address] So yes, I'm more joyful than I was the last time I breezed in here. I dyed my hair tonight, and it looks all healthy and glossy and shiny. If I was a spaniel, I'd be winning prizes for my silky pelt, I'm sure. But I'm not, which is probably a good thing, because the thought of eating nothing but Chappie and Bonios leaves me cold. I've just done my nails, as well. Chanel Rouge Noir and no smudges. Thank god for nail polish mistake pens and the wisdom of Sally Hansen, who must be to nails what Nigella Lawson is to fairy cakes. I've been fretting today a bit. Nothing serious, you understand, just one of my usual old worries, namely: where am I going to meet a nice new man? My social life should be sued under the Trades Descriptions Act, because it has no "life" whatsoever. For some bizarre reason, I can't think of a single person to call to try and organise some kind of social activity. I think there are some work nights out looming on the horizon with all the allure of a trip to the VD clinic, but other than that there is nothing at all coming up that'd be a good vehicle for me to show off my spaniel hair, my Uma-esque nails and the rather sexy little shoulderless gypsy top i bought the other week (and also the incredible strapless bra that defeats gravity and keeps the 38D love-puppies aloft in said top). My god. I just referred to my bazongas as "love-puppies". I am sick, sick, sick. Anyway, back to the issue in question: How am I going to find a nice man? There's nobody interesting at work, apart from the guy who's already got a partner (and judging by the amount of new-policies they've co-authored, they're obviously at least on speaking terms, so I shan't hold my breath for the break-up). None of my friends seem to know anybody suitable (or unsuitable for that matter), despite the fact that I've asked them all to rack their brains and keep their eyes open for me. Bah. It's all a load of guff, really. My birthday's approaching, my body's in it's last flush of perkiness and pertness and I'm in need of some worship, adoration and attention. From someone else- I can manage all the self-love (and NO, I'm not talking Betty Dodson here. Well, maybe just a little bit... ) and self-respect and self-adulation quite happily, but I need to delegate a little. Any takers? 10:07 a.m. - 13.03.02 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
||||||